And another.
AFC West
1. San Diego - A Norv Turner coached team might make the Super Bowl. The Chargers are loaded on both sides of the ball this year, and yet, they're going to give away some games because Norv is not a good coach in the fourth quarter. But they'll cruise to win this division on talent alone. They're the cream of this division's crap and will be that way for the foreseeable future.
Record: 11-5 and a deep playoff run.
2. Oakland Raiders - Well, who else do you want to put here? The Chiefs have a terrible offensive line and a defense that is equal parts old and green. The kids there are lousy (looking at you, Glenn Dorsey), and the vets don't have much in the tank. And Denver is a mess. So that leaves us with the Raiders, a team that just got obliterated 45-7 by the Saints in the preseason. A team with a head coach who might be arrested at some point in the season. I think they have enough talent on offense to be respectable, although their running game really hasn't shown up so far in the preseason. The defense is lousy. Really bad. It's always pretty bad. They have the best corner in football but the defensive line is worthless. The linebackers are decent in coverage but because the line is trash, they don't get any breaks against the run.
Record: Oh God, do I have to? Optimistically, 7-9. Pessimistically, 5-11. And what does that say about how I feel about the rest of this division? Well read on, reader.
3. Kansas City Chiefs - New QB, new GM, new head coach. Same crappy defense. Replacing Herm as the coach is worth a win or two by itself. Their offensive line is really lousy though, and I'm not sure Cassel is going to look half as good in KC as he did in New England. On the upside, the return of Larry Johnson. I'm grasping at straws here.
Record: 5-11. And that's an improvement. Oy vey!
4. Denver Broncos - This team is a mess. They're switching to a 3-4 defense, which fits no one on the team currently. Kyle Orton is replacing Jay Cutler. Let's write that again for emphasis. Kyle Orton is replacing Jay Cutler! And their best receiver has decided to quit on the team before the season starts. On the upside, Eddie Royal will put up good fantasy football numbers.
Record: 4-12, unless they start Chris Simms ahead of Orton. Then it turns into 6-10. A little better, eh?
Showing posts with label Dumb Predictions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dumb Predictions. Show all posts
Saturday, August 29, 2009
The Giant-Size NFL preview part 3 of a million
These intros keep getting shorter.
AFC South
1. Indianapolis Colts - This team is the model of consistency. Pencil them in for 12 wins a year. Peyton looks comfortable with his wideouts and the change in defensive philosophy might do this team some good. They were too passive in the Cover 2 the last couple years. This is one of 4 or 5 legitimate Super Bowl contenders in the AFC.
Record: 12-4 and a return to the AFC championship game.
2. Jacksonville Jaguars - Bounce-back year from the Jags. This is another team that I have a hard time getting a read on, but I know this: David Garrard is actually a very good QB and MJD is a top 3 running back. The offensive line should be much improved and the team should have a giant chip on their shoulder after last year's performance. This is a make or break year for Del Rio. He needs to get his team into the playoffs or he won't be coaching this team next season.
Record: 10-6 and a wildcard spot. I've changed my mind about this team roughly 55 times during the preseason. They could just as easily go 6-10 and I wouldn't be surprised.
3. Houston Texans - Everyone is high on them. They're a popular sleeper pick for the playoffs, which means they won't make it. Look at past examples of popular sleeper playoff/Super Bowl teams:
2008 Cleveland Browns - didn't come close
2007 - New Orleans Saints - didn't make the playoffs
2006 - Carolina Panthers/Miami Dolphins - didn't make the playoffs
2005 - Minnesota Vikings - Love boat scandal, Culpepper's knee blows up, Culpepper has worst year ever, and the Vikes miss the playoffs
So you see the trend here. Houston has a good offense run by a fragile QB. Their defense is getting better and I can't believe that Charlie Casserly has been vindicated in picking Mario Williams over Reggie Bush, but it was the right pick.
Record: 8-8 again.
4. Tennessee Titans - And then they came crashing down. This year, Kerry Collins will remember he is Kerry Collins, the defense will drop off without Haynesworth, and who's that we see in the distance? Why, it's the return of Vince Young, coming back as the starting quarterback in December when the games will be meaningless for this team. Here's what you need to know. They overachieved a lot last year. They think they've addressed weakness at the WR position by adding a rookie and Nate Washington, the Steelers' third option at the position. Nate fuckin' Washington. When he's your number one, just forget about throwing the ball.
Record: 6-10. Really.
AFC South
1. Indianapolis Colts - This team is the model of consistency. Pencil them in for 12 wins a year. Peyton looks comfortable with his wideouts and the change in defensive philosophy might do this team some good. They were too passive in the Cover 2 the last couple years. This is one of 4 or 5 legitimate Super Bowl contenders in the AFC.
Record: 12-4 and a return to the AFC championship game.
2. Jacksonville Jaguars - Bounce-back year from the Jags. This is another team that I have a hard time getting a read on, but I know this: David Garrard is actually a very good QB and MJD is a top 3 running back. The offensive line should be much improved and the team should have a giant chip on their shoulder after last year's performance. This is a make or break year for Del Rio. He needs to get his team into the playoffs or he won't be coaching this team next season.
Record: 10-6 and a wildcard spot. I've changed my mind about this team roughly 55 times during the preseason. They could just as easily go 6-10 and I wouldn't be surprised.
3. Houston Texans - Everyone is high on them. They're a popular sleeper pick for the playoffs, which means they won't make it. Look at past examples of popular sleeper playoff/Super Bowl teams:
2008 Cleveland Browns - didn't come close
2007 - New Orleans Saints - didn't make the playoffs
2006 - Carolina Panthers/Miami Dolphins - didn't make the playoffs
2005 - Minnesota Vikings - Love boat scandal, Culpepper's knee blows up, Culpepper has worst year ever, and the Vikes miss the playoffs
So you see the trend here. Houston has a good offense run by a fragile QB. Their defense is getting better and I can't believe that Charlie Casserly has been vindicated in picking Mario Williams over Reggie Bush, but it was the right pick.
Record: 8-8 again.
4. Tennessee Titans - And then they came crashing down. This year, Kerry Collins will remember he is Kerry Collins, the defense will drop off without Haynesworth, and who's that we see in the distance? Why, it's the return of Vince Young, coming back as the starting quarterback in December when the games will be meaningless for this team. Here's what you need to know. They overachieved a lot last year. They think they've addressed weakness at the WR position by adding a rookie and Nate Washington, the Steelers' third option at the position. Nate fuckin' Washington. When he's your number one, just forget about throwing the ball.
Record: 6-10. Really.
The Giant-Size NFL preview part 2 of a million
Here we are again. You, potentially reading this blog. Me, writing nonsense about sports that I pretend to know about. Shall we get to it then?
AFC North
1. Pittsburgh Steelers - Feels like it's going to be a bit of a letdown year for the Steelers. I don't know why and don't have solid evidence to back it up, but Big Ben's legal issues are an unnecessary distraction and I'm not sure this team is particularly hungry.
Record: 11-5 and a quick playoff exit.
2. Baltimore Ravens - Yes, they lost some talent on the defense. Yes, they lost Rob Ryan, their talented defensive coordinator. Yes, their receivers aren't great. But Flacco is making the leap this year. He's the first real QB that the Ravens have ever had. The defense still has Ray Lewis and Ed Reed, and Nagata might be the best defensive tackle in the league. Wait, why do I have them at number 2 in this division? I do have to give the defending champs a little respect.
Record: 11-5 and a nice playoff run as a wildcard team.
3. Cincinnati Bengals - The return of the high-powered Bengals offense is not enough to offset the return of the matador Bengals defense. I won't believe in their defense until I see some results on the field during actual games that count.
Record: 8-8, but they'll be sniffing the wildcard until the end of the year.
4. Cleveland Browns - Not good. How was this team talked about as a Super Bowl contender last year? Derek Anderson as a Super Bowl QB? Come on. Brady Quinn is a small improvement, but this team has already fallen apart and we're not yet to the games that count.
Record: 3-13, just an ugly year for this team. They seemed to have already tuned out Eric Mangini. Has a team ever quit on a new head coach in the preseason?
AFC North
1. Pittsburgh Steelers - Feels like it's going to be a bit of a letdown year for the Steelers. I don't know why and don't have solid evidence to back it up, but Big Ben's legal issues are an unnecessary distraction and I'm not sure this team is particularly hungry.
Record: 11-5 and a quick playoff exit.
2. Baltimore Ravens - Yes, they lost some talent on the defense. Yes, they lost Rob Ryan, their talented defensive coordinator. Yes, their receivers aren't great. But Flacco is making the leap this year. He's the first real QB that the Ravens have ever had. The defense still has Ray Lewis and Ed Reed, and Nagata might be the best defensive tackle in the league. Wait, why do I have them at number 2 in this division? I do have to give the defending champs a little respect.
Record: 11-5 and a nice playoff run as a wildcard team.
3. Cincinnati Bengals - The return of the high-powered Bengals offense is not enough to offset the return of the matador Bengals defense. I won't believe in their defense until I see some results on the field during actual games that count.
Record: 8-8, but they'll be sniffing the wildcard until the end of the year.
4. Cleveland Browns - Not good. How was this team talked about as a Super Bowl contender last year? Derek Anderson as a Super Bowl QB? Come on. Brady Quinn is a small improvement, but this team has already fallen apart and we're not yet to the games that count.
Record: 3-13, just an ugly year for this team. They seemed to have already tuned out Eric Mangini. Has a team ever quit on a new head coach in the preseason?
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