Brad Childress continues to hold back the Vikings

Before the Vikings lackluster effort against Carolina, most sportswriters and analysts had this team pegged as a legitimate Super Bowl contender. What's not to like? Good QB playing out of his mind, a top RB, a great O-line, an even better D-line, quality linebackers and a good secondary. Oh right, the coach is a moron. We've known this for a while now, but I think some people got wrapped up in how good the talent is in Minnesota that we forgot that the coach will find a way to ruin this. And he will. Mark my words. Brad Childress will cost this team a playoff game. Childress coaches not to lose; all of his games seem to be decided by a field goal. That's no way to coach.

Then there's this gem courtesy of ESPN.com:
Childress said that a quarterback who makes “five checks in a game or six checks in a game” has gone overboard. He added: “Typically the idea with a quarterback in this offense, you’re not going to the line of scrimmage looking to change the play. Because then you end up seeing ghosts.”

Um, you know Brad, Peyton Manning makes 5 or 6 checks in a drive and his team is undefeated. Experienced QBs should be allowed to call their own plays and audible. It's one of the main advantages to having a seasoned QB. Peyton Manning is great partially because he is his own offensive coordinator. Gregg Easterbrook on ESPN.com goes into this a bit more in his TMQ column. If you want to see what happens when a control-freak coach handcuffs a great veteran QB, pop in tapes of mid to late 90s Dolphins games to see how mediocre Dan Marino was under Jimmy Johnson.

Brad will ruin this team. It was a big mistake to give this guy a contract extension. What does that team do after this year when Favre retires again and they're left with Tavares Jackson and Sage Rosenfels as their QBs? I guess no worries, because Brad will call the plays, make the checks, study the film and not see any ghosts out there.

mel kiper is an idiot and kobe is the best player in the NBA

Mel Kiper doesn't watch football. I'm convinced. His draft grades are always a mess. He's a terrible writer. I'm no great shakes, but then again, I'm not getting paid to write for ESPN Insider. His latest column has him revisiting his draft grades. He has the gall to say that the Dolphins rookie CBs, who are starters for a team competing for the playoffs, are good players with low ceilings. Low ceilings? Really, Mel Kiper? If starting and showing flashes of shutdown dominance are signs of a low ceiling, then I wonder if there's any player in the NFL with a high ceiling. My main problem with all of these types of articles, and really the basis of Kiper's existence as a sports analyst, is that you can't tell if a player will be good or not in the first year. You need a good three years to evaluate a player. Look at someone like Cadillac Williams or even better Michael Clayton. These guys were great their first year, and I'm sure Kiper was raving about how good the Bucs were at drafting those years. But then you look at the rest of their careers and it's been all downhill. Cadillac peaked about three games into his NFL career and hasn't averaged more than 4 yards per carry since his rookie year. Clayton has been even worse. He was a rising star when he caught 80 passes for 1,193 yards. Since then, he's caught 139 passes for 1717 yards over the course of 5 seasons. This year, he's caught 14 passes for 204 yards. He's put up a goose-egg 3 times this year. Clearly, he's a bust. But you wouldn't have known that after his first year.

In other news, Kobe is the best NBA player today. Sorry, LeBron James, but show me a ring and you'll get the top spot. Kobe is the guy every other NBA player looks up to now. The scary thing is that Kobe is better this year than last year. This is a guy that scores 40 points with a torn tendon in his index finger. He added at least 4 or 5 post moves this offseason to bring his repertoire up to something like 5,016. If you watch LeBron, you'll realize quickly he's the most talented NBA player, but he hasn't yet put it together. He's getting there, but I'm a bit disappointed that we're not see LeBron destroy people in the post more often. I know, I know: Kobe has the advantage of playing on a better team. The Cavs are very mediocre without their star. Shaq is 35 pounds overweight, Mo Williams is a third banana playing a second banana's role, Anthony Parker's a bench player playing a starter and the Big Z looks and moves like he's 40. But I haven't seen the King take a stranglehold of this team and impose his will on these guys.

quick thoughts (it's been a long time coming)

A quick note about my NFL forecast. I, like everyone else who tries to predict the NFL season, was wrong about most things. That would be why I'm the Idiot Fan and not just the Fan.

1. I really like the MNF announcing team. I might be the only one in the world.
2. Going for it on 4th and 2 is playing the percentages. The average NFL play is something like 4.5 yards and most 3rd and 2 and 4th and 2 conversions are successful, especially when you have an offense like the Patriots.
3. However, jesus, what balls on Belicheck. Wow. Also, if you're going to go for it, don't do it with a rinky dink pass to a running back. Play action deep to Moss or to Welker on a crossing route.
4. Peyton is the best QB in the league right now. Better than Brees.
5. It's a toss-up. Brady Quinn, Derek Anderson or Jamarcus Russell, who's worse? I say Russell, but he's at least more talented than Derek Anderson.
6. Speaking of wasted talent, Darius Heyward-Bey and his hands of stone. But at least he's fast, oy vey!
7. The Giants will go on a run. Just a hunch.
8. Andy Reid is the white Art Shell when it comes to clock mismanagement.
9. It should be noted: Andy Reid has been outcoached by Wade Phillips and Norv Turner in consecutive weeks. Wade Phillips and Norv Turner!
10. The Bengals are for real. Time for everyone to acknowledge it. They swept the Ravens and the Steelers and have one more game against the Browns. This team could have homefield advantage through the playoffs.

the Giant-Size NFL preview part 4 of a million

And another.

AFC West

1. San Diego - A Norv Turner coached team might make the Super Bowl. The Chargers are loaded on both sides of the ball this year, and yet, they're going to give away some games because Norv is not a good coach in the fourth quarter. But they'll cruise to win this division on talent alone. They're the cream of this division's crap and will be that way for the foreseeable future.
Record: 11-5 and a deep playoff run.

2. Oakland Raiders - Well, who else do you want to put here? The Chiefs have a terrible offensive line and a defense that is equal parts old and green. The kids there are lousy (looking at you, Glenn Dorsey), and the vets don't have much in the tank. And Denver is a mess. So that leaves us with the Raiders, a team that just got obliterated 45-7 by the Saints in the preseason. A team with a head coach who might be arrested at some point in the season. I think they have enough talent on offense to be respectable, although their running game really hasn't shown up so far in the preseason. The defense is lousy. Really bad. It's always pretty bad. They have the best corner in football but the defensive line is worthless. The linebackers are decent in coverage but because the line is trash, they don't get any breaks against the run.
Record: Oh God, do I have to? Optimistically, 7-9. Pessimistically, 5-11. And what does that say about how I feel about the rest of this division? Well read on, reader.

3. Kansas City Chiefs - New QB, new GM, new head coach. Same crappy defense. Replacing Herm as the coach is worth a win or two by itself. Their offensive line is really lousy though, and I'm not sure Cassel is going to look half as good in KC as he did in New England. On the upside, the return of Larry Johnson. I'm grasping at straws here.
Record: 5-11. And that's an improvement. Oy vey!

4. Denver Broncos - This team is a mess. They're switching to a 3-4 defense, which fits no one on the team currently. Kyle Orton is replacing Jay Cutler. Let's write that again for emphasis. Kyle Orton is replacing Jay Cutler! And their best receiver has decided to quit on the team before the season starts. On the upside, Eddie Royal will put up good fantasy football numbers.
Record: 4-12, unless they start Chris Simms ahead of Orton. Then it turns into 6-10. A little better, eh?

The Giant-Size NFL preview part 3 of a million

These intros keep getting shorter.

AFC South

1. Indianapolis Colts - This team is the model of consistency. Pencil them in for 12 wins a year. Peyton looks comfortable with his wideouts and the change in defensive philosophy might do this team some good. They were too passive in the Cover 2 the last couple years. This is one of 4 or 5 legitimate Super Bowl contenders in the AFC.
Record: 12-4 and a return to the AFC championship game.

2. Jacksonville Jaguars - Bounce-back year from the Jags. This is another team that I have a hard time getting a read on, but I know this: David Garrard is actually a very good QB and MJD is a top 3 running back. The offensive line should be much improved and the team should have a giant chip on their shoulder after last year's performance. This is a make or break year for Del Rio. He needs to get his team into the playoffs or he won't be coaching this team next season.
Record: 10-6 and a wildcard spot. I've changed my mind about this team roughly 55 times during the preseason. They could just as easily go 6-10 and I wouldn't be surprised.

3. Houston Texans - Everyone is high on them. They're a popular sleeper pick for the playoffs, which means they won't make it. Look at past examples of popular sleeper playoff/Super Bowl teams:
2008 Cleveland Browns - didn't come close
2007 - New Orleans Saints - didn't make the playoffs
2006 - Carolina Panthers/Miami Dolphins - didn't make the playoffs
2005 - Minnesota Vikings - Love boat scandal, Culpepper's knee blows up, Culpepper has worst year ever, and the Vikes miss the playoffs

So you see the trend here. Houston has a good offense run by a fragile QB. Their defense is getting better and I can't believe that Charlie Casserly has been vindicated in picking Mario Williams over Reggie Bush, but it was the right pick.
Record: 8-8 again.

4. Tennessee Titans - And then they came crashing down. This year, Kerry Collins will remember he is Kerry Collins, the defense will drop off without Haynesworth, and who's that we see in the distance? Why, it's the return of Vince Young, coming back as the starting quarterback in December when the games will be meaningless for this team. Here's what you need to know. They overachieved a lot last year. They think they've addressed weakness at the WR position by adding a rookie and Nate Washington, the Steelers' third option at the position. Nate fuckin' Washington. When he's your number one, just forget about throwing the ball.
Record: 6-10. Really.

The Giant-Size NFL preview part 2 of a million

Here we are again. You, potentially reading this blog. Me, writing nonsense about sports that I pretend to know about. Shall we get to it then?

AFC North

1. Pittsburgh Steelers - Feels like it's going to be a bit of a letdown year for the Steelers. I don't know why and don't have solid evidence to back it up, but Big Ben's legal issues are an unnecessary distraction and I'm not sure this team is particularly hungry.
Record: 11-5 and a quick playoff exit.

2. Baltimore Ravens - Yes, they lost some talent on the defense. Yes, they lost Rob Ryan, their talented defensive coordinator. Yes, their receivers aren't great. But Flacco is making the leap this year. He's the first real QB that the Ravens have ever had. The defense still has Ray Lewis and Ed Reed, and Nagata might be the best defensive tackle in the league. Wait, why do I have them at number 2 in this division? I do have to give the defending champs a little respect.
Record: 11-5 and a nice playoff run as a wildcard team.

3. Cincinnati Bengals - The return of the high-powered Bengals offense is not enough to offset the return of the matador Bengals defense. I won't believe in their defense until I see some results on the field during actual games that count.
Record: 8-8, but they'll be sniffing the wildcard until the end of the year.

4. Cleveland Browns - Not good. How was this team talked about as a Super Bowl contender last year? Derek Anderson as a Super Bowl QB? Come on. Brady Quinn is a small improvement, but this team has already fallen apart and we're not yet to the games that count.
Record: 3-13, just an ugly year for this team. They seemed to have already tuned out Eric Mangini. Has a team ever quit on a new head coach in the preseason?

The Giant-Size NFL preview part 1 of a million

I keep saying this: Thank God for football season. It was way too long. Even the crappy preseason has been enough to tide me over until mid-September. We're getting a decent idea of what to expect from teams, even though preseason won/loss records are meaningless and not a good indicator of regular season success (see 2008 Detroit Lions and 2006 Oakland Raiders). But you can still tell a bit about a team by their training camp and the first quarters of preseason games. Again, the Raiders were terrible on offense the past few years in camp and the opening quarters and sure enough, they were equally terrible on offense during the regular season. So without further ado,

Your 2009 NFL season predictions that you can take to the bank (and lose a lot of money on, much like a bank these days, actually):

AFC East
1. The Patriots - Ugh. I hate this team, but they look so damn good. Robo-Brady may wreak havoc, they have arguably the best receiving corp in the league (though they're getting a little old between Moss and Galloway), the defense should be 100 times better and they have something to prove. Plus, they still have the best head coach in the league. Shit, this team could go 14-2 this year. A couple things worry me: their running backs are ordinary (I know, it didn't matter when they went 16-0) and their offensive line is not fantastic. They were manhandled by the Bengals in a preseason game. Manhandled by the Bengals. Thought I should repeat that because it just seems so shocking. Still, their linebackers are much improved, their defensive line is always top-notch, the corners are well, the Pats always get by with rubbish corners.
Record: 13-3

2. Miami Dolphins - Miami has the Dolphins, the greatest football team. Well not this year. Plus, the stupid team remixed the song. Bad karma potential there. I like the Dolphins, I really do. They overachieved big time last year, but they're well-coached and they have a decent QB in Pennington. Plus, Pennington actually knows the playbook this year. He was the most accurate QB in the league last year and he didn't know the playbook. Pretty amazing actually. Ted Ginn Jr. is putting it together and looks like a legit number one receiver. They have depth at that position this year too. I like Fasano as their tight end. The defense looks to be improved, though I'm not completely sold the Gibril Wilson/Yeremiah Bell combo at safety yet.
Record: 9-7. Sorry, Dolfans, your team is good, not great.

3. The Buffalo Bills - The TO experiment. That's what this season boils down to. Here's what TO can't cover up:
a. Their running back is crazy/unreliable
b. Their defense can be pushed around
c. Their head coach is one of the worst game managers in the league.
It's the last one that will kill them this year. I posted about this previously.
Record: 7-9 (again!). It could blow up completely and they end up being 5-11. I don't see a winning record for them.

4. The J-E-T-S - I like Rex Ryan. I kind of like the defense. I think Mark Sanchez will be a good QB, just not this year. They get by on sheer guts and bravado this year. Watch out for next year though. This team will make a major leap in 2010.
Record: 6-10.

The Mistake by the Lake (or how Brett Favre is a big mistake)

Not that the Browns are looking so hot nowadays, but the mistake by the lake I'm referring to involves Minnesota and not the city that bears the unfortunate nickname. Brett Favre is back. It makes the Vikings more interesting, but does it really make them that much better?

If you watch ESPN, the obvious answer seems to yes, of course, idiot, But look at it this way:

Does Brett Favre make Minnesota a Super Bowl contender? No. Their secondary still isn't great, their head coach is still a cross between a high school coach and a porn star, and their quarterback still has a penchant for throwing costly interceptions.

Is Brett Favre the best quarterback in the NFC North? Again, no. He's third behind Cutler, who is like a younger Favre in a lot of ways, and Aaron Rodgers.

Is it a good idea to sign a 39 year old quarterback after training camp? No. He has no chemistry with his receivers, offensive line, coaches and running backs. His arrival means Sage Rosenfels and Tavaris Jackson are thrown under the bus. He doesn't fully know the playbook. All of this means that he's going to be more inclined to wing it during the season, and with Favre, that can be a dangerous proposition. He's the all-time leader in interceptions for a reason.

How motivated will Favre be, especially if he loses to the Packers twice this season? This is the hardest question to answer. Some people think his return is motivated by revenge and if he loses out on that, will he care about the rest of the season? I have no idea.

Is Brett Favre worth $12 million for one year? No. The Vikings paid $12 million for a one-year traveling circus. They paid $12 million to give Brad Childress one last chance to prove he's a competent NFL head coach. The last head coach that pinned his hopes to Favre ended up fired and exiled to coach in Cleveland. By some accounts last year, Brett was a primadonna in the locker room.

Is 39 year old Brett Favre $11 million better than 39 year old Jeff Garcia? No. Call me crazy, but I would rather have Garcia. He's well-versed in the West Coast offense and he takes care of the football. He doesn't have the arm strength of Favre, but he's a lot less likely to throw stupid interceptions. In his last four years, Favre has had one really good one and three mediocre to bad ones. We forget this because the Brett Favre hype machine is always on during the season, but if he were anyone else, he would have been replaced before he had the chance to have that one good year in 2007. Garcia has had three pretty good years out of the last four years, and his one bad year in that period came with the Detroit Lions, so that's hardly fair to hold that against him. And here's the kicker: Garcia makes $1 million this year as a backup. The Vikings could have had him if they went after him early in the offseason. He was a good fit for their offense.

I see the Vikings getting a nice 9-7 season out of the Favre experiment. Their ceiling is really 10-6, and there's a good chance they finish under .500 and get Childress fired.

Ok, one more NBA post and then for real, it's all football all the time

A few NBA related thoughts that I never got out:

1. Orlando blew it by not resigning Turkoglu and instead using the same amount of money on Brandon Bass and Marcin Gortat. That's just insane. Turkoglu was their second best player last year and their clutch guy, and as much as I don't like the way he plays, I can admit that he was integral to their team. With him, they had three 6'10" or taller guys in the starting lineup. The Magic could have trotted out a starting lineup of Jameer Nelson, Vince Carter, Hedo Turkoglu, Rashard Lewis and Dwight Howard. Would that have been the best starting five in the league? You could argue that San Antonio, the Lakers or Boston could match that, but that's a pretty damn good lineup. I originally thought they were trying to save money by not resigning Turkoglu, but then they went ahead and matched Dallas' stupid offer to Gortat (five years/$34 million for a backup center averaging 12 minutes a game). Ummm..Why? He would never, ever push Dwight Howard for playing time. Let Dallas sign their newest Erick Dampier. Then they went ahead and gave stupid money to Brandon Bass (4 years/$18 million). I know, I know, he's young, he's got some talent, the price wasn't that high. But for the same price of these two, they could have kept Turkoglu, who's better than both of them combined.

2. Lakers resigned Odom and all is right in the world. Their lineup is scary good, especially if Bynum can improve.

3. Good God, the Celtics have signed every big man in the world. But they pissed off Rondo, and no one knows if he'll be in the right mindset to start the season. But I like signing Sheed, even if he has nothing left in the tank. Getting Big Baby back was another great deal. I like the Shelden Williams signing. They are very, very deep in the frontcourt.

the vick thing

As most of you know, the Eagles signed Michael Vick to be their backup quarterback. I'm not sure why. He's not the missing piece of the puzzle for the Eagles. The Eagles have been missing one piece for a number of years, and every year, whether it's through the draft or free agency, they fail to address it. The Eagles need a power running back, someone with size who can get tough yards and fight through tackles. I said the same thing last year. They suck near the goal line because they don't have a good fullback or big running back who can convert third and goal or fourth and goal.

How does Vick address this? He doesn't. They can put him in as a Wildcat quarterback near the goal line to give defenses something else to think about, but do they really want to be taking out Donovan McNabb in scoring situations. He's their best player. The other thing with Vick is all the media he drags behind him. Is a backup quarterback worth a season-long media circus?

Football is back

Thank God. It's been too long. I was starting to give you up for the NBA, following that offseason with a keen interest, but I can put that aside now. It's football season and I can start posting about a sport people actually care about now. Hard to get a true read on teams in the preseason, but there are some truths to be had, such as:

Truth #1 - Cleveland will be lousy. They were pretty bad against a 3-4 defense they should be seeing everyday in practice. Actually, this was against a Packers team transitioning to the 3-4 with guys learning new positions and with their top two corners sitting out. Yikes! On the road to another 4-10 season. Good luck, Mangenius.

Truth #2 - ESPN will only care about the following three players (in order): Brett Favre, Tom Brady, Peyton Manning. And they're starting to slip on Peyton. They only talk about Brett Favre, despite him being a washed-up retired has-been, and Tom Brady, who they gushed about and casually ignored the pick he threw in the preseason game. I would give up ESPN if they didn't have the rights to EVERY sport. That's probably a really bad thing, right? Too much power in one place and that place is too concerned with promoting itself at every turn. Deadspin has a good ESPN catchphrase analysis bit that they do every so often.

Truth #3 - Denver won't be good this year. Orton has looked like crap all throughout training camp and now the preseason. Their defense is a combined 1,000 years old, the secondary is really old especially, Jarvis Moss sucks at DE/OLB, they don't have a nose tackle and they're switching to a 3-4 defense. And they traded arguably the best young QB in the league this offseason and got back Kyle Orton. And their best receiver, Brandon Marshall, doesn't seem to give a shit about playing for the Broncos. Seems like Josh McDaniels might be a wee bit in over his head. If this was the Raiders, ESPN would be making a ton of cracks about all this, but they are strangely silent about Denver's slow swirl down the train.

More Marlins than you can shake a stick at

Editor's Note: This post is a few days old, and I was slow to put it up, perhaps because the writer trashes my Marlins analysis in the opening sentence of the post. Just saying... Anywho, here's another post from one of only 5 real Marlins fans on the planet, ladies and gentlefolk, Mr. Jesse Bryan:

--------
Inspired by Jason's ESPNesque "coverage" of the marlins in his last
post (seriously "The Marlins are young and so very up and down" is all
you can muster?!?!), I've decided it's about darn time for a fish
post.

The season thus far: Once again the team with the lowest payroll is in
playoff contention. To elaborate Jason's statement, yes this has been
very up and down year with more ups than downs. After a psychedelic
11-1 start, the fish fumbled in a pretty dramatic way losing a whole
bunch of games and not winning nearly as many. I first attributed this
fumbling to the vile new namesake of Joe Robbie stadium, "Landshark
Stadium." Being associated with Jimmy Buffet is never good for
business and the fish obviously went into a deep depression when this
change occurred. I'm surprised no one committed suicide because I
almost did after puking no less than 15 times. However, the fish
battled back and have put themselves back in contention. Then with
things heating up, they go and get swept by the nationals (after
series wins against the Dodgers (take that Jason), Cubs and Braves).
"Boo hoo" I thought and also exclaimed out loud. Next thing I know,
they sweep the Phillies and are right back in. Baseball.

So here we are with a huge series with the wild card leading Rockies.
Last August did the fish in. Except for the Nationals sweep, this
August has been excellent. The offense is scorching the ball like I've
never seen before from a marlins team. Now let's take a peak and what
has occurred this year:

Starting pitching: Except for JJ, completely inconsistent. What was
supposed to be the fishies great strength has been a battle all year.
Nolasco started off with a 9+ era only to get sent down and come back
and return to the Nolasco of last year. They had to call up Sean West
early due to injuries/demotions and he has done a very serviceable
job. Same with Vanderhurk. Sanchez got injured again, but he has not
been so hot. He's pitched some nice starts in the minors and should be
called up soon and the fish will need him to pitch well of they're to
make a push. If the fish starting pitching can someone stabilize (the
talent is there), then they could really go on a tear with bats
hitting like they are.

Bullpen: I got to give high marks to the pen although Fredi's
management of them has been quite bad at times. What was perceived to
be a huge weakness has been excellent for the toddlers in teal. Brian
Sanches, Kiko Calero, Dan Meyer, Burke Badenhop, Brian Donnelly and
Leo Nunez have done a great job. Lindstrom has not been so effective
and I cringe at him closing again. The pen has pitched a whole bunch
of innings, which means the starters really need to starting rattling
off the quality starts.

Bats: The fish started hot, then went ice cold. Uggla was having a
horrible year with his average below .200 at one point. Bonifacio was
just awful and so is Hermida. Then all of a sudden the fish have had
10 hits in the last 10 games for the first time ever. Everyone is
killing the ball right now (well except for hermida). Uggla has
finally hit his stride, Hanley is Hanley, Coghlan is a bad ass, ross
is clutch and the baker/paulino combo has put up the best numbers in
the mlb at the catcher position since the all star break. And Nick
Johnson has been absolutely amazing (he gets his own section). Gload
and Helms have been awesome coming off the bench. They rank 1st and
3rd in the MLB for pinch hits and Gload's walk off brought a tear to
my eye. Watch out phillies.

Defense: Definitely much improved. Besides Bonifacio's ineptitude at
third and hermida in RF, the defense has been good to stellar at
times. I recall there was a 10 or so game streak without an error.
Coghlan has become quite the left fielder considering his natural
position is 2nd base. Nice job fish.

Nick Johnson: In terms of impact, I would argue that NJ was the best
mid-season trade by any mlb team. This guy is the piece the fish were
missing. Bonifacio's OBP is about .290 while NJ's is over .400 and is
6th in the MLB. Having him hit between the smoking hot Coghlan (8
multi-hit games in a row) and Hanley has been huge for this team. On
top of that, Boni has flourished in the utility role. His gold glove
also hasn't hurt, although it has taken Cantu a little bit to get
settled at third.

Not to bad at all. And what's next for our fishies? I think the win
the division. The Phillies will collapse while the finish continue
their hot hitting with solid pitching to back up. Once the fish get
into the playoffs, we all know what happens next....

the great lull

Honestly, I haven't been a big follower of Major League Baseball in a long time. The first strike hurt, but I followed through Sosa and McGuire's home run chase. It wasn't steroids that turned me away from the game. It was just that my favorite team, the Dodgers of Los Angeles, were mediocre for a long period of time after 1988. They had that run of Rookie of the Year award winners in the 1990s, but those guys could never put it together to make a serious playoff run. There's was a brief bit of excitement when Lima time hit, but that team was done in four games. Then came last year and the one incredible trade that the Dodgers have made in the last 25 years: the Manny Ramirez deal. And now I care. Yes, call me fairweather or whatever. I love this team. I have a coffee mug and an old '88 World Series T that's all worn out and was originally my brother's back in '88. Then the Manny roids thing happened. I remember when I heard that. I was in O'Hare airport waiting to catch a plane to Minnesota and I called my family. Manny, steroids, out for 50 games. Shock, disbelief, but no despair. This team was too good for that. They had built such a big lead in the West with Manny that I reasoned if they could go .500 while Manny was out, they'd still be leading the West or close enough to make a run into the playoffs. The suspension would be a blessing in disguise because Manny would come back in July completely fresh and ready for the stretch run. It worked out better than any Dodger fan could hope. The team didn't just tread water; they ran roughshod over the National League going 29-21 and opening up a seemingly insurmountable lead in the West. Manny's back and completely healthy, well-rested for the time of year that really matters. And as a result, the Dodgers look like the only legitimate team in the National League.

Every other team is deeply flawed. The East is terrible. The Mets are broken and play like they expect to lose. Somehow Jerry Manuel isn't getting the heat that Willie Randolph felt despite the fact the two have similar records as manager of the Mets. The Phillies don't look like the Phillies of last year, and I think they only really get up when they know they have a chance to humiliate the Mets. The Marlins are young and so very up and down. I actually kinda like the Braves to win that division. They've got one of the best managers in baseball and their rotation isn't too bad. Plus, it just seems like every time this division is in flux like this and no one wants to step up, that the Braves just sort of shrug their shoulders and say "well I guess we've got to win this division again."

And then there's the Central. Milwaukee, ugh. St. Louis, a threat because of Pujols, but they've got holes all over the place. The Cubs? History is in their heads and we won't know if they can shake it until they get to the World Series. The Cubs haven't been all too good in years after going to the playoffs though and it looks like this year might be more of the same.

The Last NBA post in a while

We've hit the dog days of sports when only the mid-summer moves of Major League Baseball can keep a sports fan interested. No NFL, no NBA, but there are a few of things going on with at least one of those sports.

Vinsanity to Orlando. Shaq to Cleveland. Amare to Golden State?

1. The Vince Carter deal. What a great deal for Orlando. Really, really good deal. They get an athletic wing that can play the 2 or 3, can take over games late, create shots for others, hits 3 pointers and is probably at the point in his career where he wants to play with other good players and will defer to them to win a championship. Basically, he's a poor man's Kobe Bryant. And all they really gave up is Courtney Lee, who can be a good player but will never be a Vince Carter. Now, Orlando looks like a championship contender even if they don't resign Hedo Turkoglu. If they do resign him, they have to be considered the favorites in the East.

2. Shaq to Cleveland. Another great deal for the Cavs that came about a half a year too late. If they do this deal in February, they might be celebrating a title. At least now, they get a motivated Diesel who will do the things they need: frontcourt scoring, rebounding, defense, toughness. Now they need a guard who's taller than 6'3". Even with Shaq, they won't be able to beat the Lakers if they don't have someone who can check Kobe.

3. Amare to Golden State? If this is true and it happens, then I guess the Suns have given up on trying to be a contender. They really blew it when they traded Marion for Shaq and the Shaq to Cleveland deal is a partial admission of it. They had a great core that was in contention every year but no depth. So they decided to trade the core. D'oh. This is why the NBA only has a few great teams and a lot of mediocre to bad teams. The GMs are just kind of dumb sometimes. In fairness to Steve Kerr, Robert Sarver has demonstrated time and again that he won't pay the luxury tax even if it means winning a title. So with this deal, Phoenix is saying that instead of rebuilding around an explosive 26 power forward/center, they've decided to rebuild around an aging 35 year old point guard in Steve Nash.

A few more NBA thoughts

- Derek Fisher is very quietly having a pretty damn good Finals series. He's averaging 10 points on 50% shooting from both the field and the 3 point line.

- Kobe just didn't come through. He wanted it so bad that he could shoot straight. He had the worst 31 point game a player can have. Took too many shots, was way too cold in the second half and missed free throws and an open layup that would have tied the game. The ghost of Nick Anderson was haunting Kobe of all people.

- That said, Orlando played as good a game as they're going to play in the Finals. They shot an astounding 62.5% from the field and still only won by 4. Think about that. They almost lost a game where they shot more than 60%. I expect the Lakers to clamp down better on defense in Game 4 and pull it out. Of course, I always expect the Lakers to win, so I may not be the best predictor here.

One NBA Finals thought

Hedo Turkoglu commits an offensive foul every time he brings the ball up court or drives to the basket. And that's not a bad joke about the quality of his play. He's a talented player, but he leads with his right elbow as he drives with his left hand dribbling the ball. He frequently pushes off with his elbow and then will use that elbow to get tangled up with his defender and get bailed out with a foul call. But he should be the one the refs call foul on. You just can't lead with your elbow. Other players do push off, but they do it subtly with their hands and at least try to hide it. Hedo's not subtle.

Looking ahead to how the Magic match up in the Finals

I think the number of followers to this blog has droppped.

Barring a Magic-like collapse, Orlando should be in the NBA Finals. They're up 3-1 against the Cavs and they've got three chances to put this series away. They seemed to have developed a killer instinct after that Boston series. I like their odds.

Looking ahead to the Finals, and I think the Magic should be hoping that the Lakers beat the Nuggets because that's a much better matchup for them. The Magic have Pietrus and Courtney Lee, along with Hedo, to throw at Kobe and Howard can push around Gasol. The Lakers-Nuggets series is going at least six games and most likely seven, so the Lakers will continue to be exhausted going into the Finals. And Rafer Alston can afford to be spotty against the Lakers crap trio of point guards.

Denver, on the other hand, will give Orlando problems. Nene and K-Mart will rough up Dwight Howard and probably get in his head enough to force him into a technical foul, and Dwight's one away from an automatic one game suspension. Melo can guard any of Orlando's shooters and take Rashard Lewis out of the game. He can put them into a foul trouble too. Chauncey will destroy Rafer Alston and JR Smith, as long as he continues to play smart, negates Courtney Lee. Basically, Orlando would be facing a meaner version of this year's Celtics team.

That said, I can't believe what I'm going to say next. Orlando should be FAVORED in any Finals series provided they take care of business against the Cavs. This team is for real. I completely underestimated them, but they're well coached and that would make the difference in a series against Denver.

Here's the thing I notice about Denver. I'm not fully convinced that the team likes playing for George Karl. I think they like playing for Chauncey Billups. This Denver team quit on Karl some time late last year and started the season like they didn't care. Then Chauncey comes over in the Iverson trade (one of the most lopsided deals ever, and does that make Joe Dumars the GM or the Chrysler of the NBA?) and all of a sudden, the team looks loose and plays like it's having fun. You know who still doesn't look loose? George Karl. Chauncey is coaching this team. He calls the plays on the court and the guys listen to him. This is the exact same situation that Mike Dunleavy was in a few years back when the Clippers made the playoffs and Sam Cassell was basically coaching the team as the point guard. I don't think those guys liked Dunleavy back then and they quit on him the next season as Cassell was phased out. They didn't have confidence in his coaching decisions, which is understandable given that Dunleavy is absolutely terrible, and I think the same applies to the Nuggets and George Karl. Watch. Karl will make one or two more fourth quarter coaching blunders that will cost Denver a game or maybe the series. The bad thing for Denver is that Chauncey and his team know it's coming. They saw it in Game 1 with the inbounds pass fiasco. I can see him doing something dumb in Game 5 or 6 and the team just mailing in the next game. That won't happen on the other end with Phil Jackson and the Lakers, though Kobe may physically kill a few of his teammates before the end of the playoffs.

addendum to more nba stuff

a day later, and look at what we have here. The Cavs are down 2-1 to the Magic, and really, they would be down 3-0 and on the verge of getting swept if LeBron hadn't made a borderline miracle shot at the end of game 2. I've heard people compare the Denver-LA series to the LA-Detroit Finals series from '04, but I think this Cavs-Magic series is more like that one. In that series, the Lakers won one game on a miracle 3 pointer from Kobe that sent the game to OT. The Magic destroyed, repeat DESTROYED, the Cavs at home in the regular season. Now they beat them by 10 in the playoffs. The Cavs are in a lot of trouble. LeBron put in another 40+ point game, but didn't shoot particularly well, and his teammates have yet to show up for this series. He's been great, but without Mo, Wally, Delonte, Z, Varajeo, Big Ben, Boobie and the rest, he won't make it past the Magic. Even if they do, I don't see how this team defends the Lakers. Gasol will run circles around their big men. They have no one who can guard Odom, and they won't want to stick LeBron on Kobe and risk losing some of LeBron's energy on the offensive end.

In the West, the Lakers are back in control after (depending on who you believe) stealing Game 3 or showing their veteran prowess in the Game 3. I prefer the latter. Forever underappreciated Kobe scored 41 points on pretty effective shooting and dished out 5 assists and basically carried the team in the 4th quarter. Yeah, he's not averaging a 35/9/7 like LeBron is in the post-season, but he's still the best player on arguably the most talented team in the postseason and he's been playing like this while having been basically playing ball for 2 years straight including two postseasons and one trip to the Olympics. And oh yeah, he's had a broken pinkie finger this entire time that would have sidelined almost any other player. Can we appreciate him for being one of the best NBA players of all time? That's definitely not in dispute. Kobe is a top 20 player and an absolute assassin with two minutes left in the game. He's one of the greatest clutch players ever and one of the most intense competitors the league has ever had. Is he Jordan? No. He's not as competitive, not as smart and not as complete of a player, but it's close. Kobe's got better range on his shot and he has the same ice running in veins. Kobe's big deficiency is that he can't consistently get his teammates involved like MJ did.

And don't the people who basically wrote the Lakers obituary after Game 2 feel real dumb now. The Lakers are up 2-1 with a chance to put the series out of reach on Monday. The lesson: if a series is 1-1, then it's even. This seems really obvious. I mean painfully obvious, but never underestimate the vapidity of the sportswriting consensus.

more nba stuff

so explain this to me: The Lakers won game 1 and lost game 2 because Phil Jackson drew up a last second play for Derek Fisher instead of Kobe Bryant, and all of the sudden the consensus is that the Lakers are in a lot of trouble and probably won't win the West (see ESPN's SportsNation poll for more). Yet the Cavs, having only beaten weak teams in the playoffs so far, drop game 1 and come within a LeBron James semi-miracle, totally amazing 3 pointer from being down 2-0 to the Magic, and yet, no one seems to be writing their obituary. You know what we've learned so far in that series? LeBron is better than advertised and the rest of his team grossly overachieved in the regular season and seem lost in the playoffs. Mo Williams has been bad. The Big Z is slow and ineffective against Dwight Howard, even though Howard has no post game whatsoever.

Speaking of Howard, if Dwight had just one move in the post, just one, the Magic would be up 2-0 and we might be talking about them as the heavy favorites to win the whole thing. Watch him. He's awful on one-on-one offense. He's the best, most athletic energy player in the NBA, maybe ever, but he can't post anyone up. He has this weird running hook that he flings hard at the basket and he can dunk if he's right underneath the basket. He can't drive and doesn't have any touch around the rim. No layups, no jumpers, and no range. That said, what he does is amazing and that he can get 20 points a night is incredible. He scores entirely on effort: alley-oops fed to him, putbacks, and pick-and-roll dunks. And that's it. He's a beast on the boards, but he can be really thin-skinned and if the Cavs are smart, they get Ben Wallace or someone to get really physical with him. "Superman" gets a bit snippy when he gets pushed around. He took a few cheap shots at Kendrick Perkins last round because Perkins could push him around.

Back to the Cavs, they're in a lot of trouble if they can't figure out a way to guard Rashard Lewis and Hedo. The Cavs should go small, put James at the 4 and have him guard Lewis. Put Varajeo on Howard to take away the really easy dunks on deep post passes. Stick Delonte on Hedo, where despite the height difference, Delonte can effectively harass Hedo into turnovers. Make guys like Rafer Alston beat them. Meanwhile, Orlando's going back home where in the regular season, they absolutely destroyed the Cavs. It could be that this Magic team is just a matchup nightmare for the Cavs for whatever reason. Houston was a matchup problem for the Lakers last round despite missing Yao Ming and maybe because they were missing Tracy McGrady. By the way, I love how the same writers who were saying that Houston was better off without McGrady were then giving the Lakers shit for not being able to beat a Houston team without McGrady. Consistency, please.

manny and roids

There's no way that Manny Ramirez used steroids. He's too lazy to cycle properly. Too undisciplined to stick to that kind of regiment. It's possible that he tried it once and used them wrong and got nothing out of it and stopped. That's about the only scenario where I can envision him knowingly taking roids. Manny seems like more of a pothead than a meathead.

the lakers wake up...finally!

They needed that. The game one loss was ugly for the Lakers. They couldn't hit a three-point shot, Kobe was held in check and Bynum and Odom essentially took that night off. Only 10 fast break points, and an overall lethargic and yes, lazy effort from the most talented team in the NBA. Note: not the best team, but the most talented. Their only glaring hole is at point guard.

So just about everyone knew that the Lakers would take game two. And they did, but it was how they did it. They roughed up the Rockets. They traded blows with Ron Artest. They got under Houston's skin and put doubt in their minds. And oh yeah, Kobe became a scoring juggernaut again, racking 40 against the Battier/Artest combo. Lamar Odom showed up, although Andrew Bynum is still on vacation.

Game 3 is the big test and you have to know that Phil Jackson is going to have his team ready. If the Lakers take game 3, they can send a strong message to not just he Rockets, but the Denver Nuggets, their likely opponent in the Western Conference Finals, as well.

In other LA sports news, the Dodgers just opened up 13-0 at home. Holy cow! I will know follow baseball. Expect a more detailed post on this and how the Yankees screwed themselves by screwing their fans. In the meantime, I'll resume my tour of America's least exciting airports. LaGuardia, you're up. Next stop: O'Hare.

simple mathmatics

BULLS -CELTICS > Sleep

Jesus, triple overtime and counting...

not so instant draft analysis

Worst pick of the first round: Mark Sanchez - #5 overall by the Jets.
The Jets traded the farm to get the quarterback they wanted, but why? Is Sanchez a franchise quarterback? Well, I don't think so. Let's look at some of Mark Sanchez's numbers last year.

He lit up Penn State to tune of 413 yards, 4 TDs and 80% completion. But he stunk up the joint against Arizona State and really didn't play any top defenses. He had a pretty good year last year, but is he a one-year wonder? He's not really a guy they want to start right away and what else do the Jets have at that position? Kellen Clemens, Erik Ainge. These aren't guys that you want holding down the fort for a couple years while Sanchez gets his legs under him.

Second worst pick of the first round: Darrius Heyward-Bey - #7 overall by the Raiders. Good god. Crabtree's on the board and the Raiders go with a guy that had two games last season where he didn't have a catch. It's a classic Raiders pick. Heyward-Bey runs a great 40 time and looks like a good athlete, but his hands and football IQ are questionable. By the way, 40 times are pretty meaningless. It's rare that a player is going to run 40 yards in a straight line in a football game.

The Browns, on the other hand, put on a draft deal clinic, trading down multiple times to pick up more picks and they still got the guy they wanted. The Bengals also made the most of their two picks and got Andre Smith, maybe the top offensive tackle, and Rey Maualuga, maybe the top middle linebacker.

Though really, the truth is this analysis is only a guess. No one really knows who will be a bust and who will have a bust made in Canton one day. It takes a good three to four years to really get a handle on how successful a team's draft was. Look at KC's draft last year. Everyone gave them an A, but Dorsey was invisible last season. So now, that draft doesn't look so great, but there's a chance that he makes an impact this year. If by his third or fourth year, he's still invisible, you can safely say it was a wasted pick and a failed draft. So don't believe the grades you read right now, even from and maybe especially from me. And don't buy people that put up 38 mock drafts. They stlll don't get the picks right.

on the road

In the land of beautiful beaches, perfect weather and two of my favorite sports teams, the lakers and the dodgers, and taking advantage of the blackberry to post while on the road. Wouldn't want to deprieve my loyal readership of 4 of a new post.

In basketball news, adding injury to injury, leon powe is done for the rest of the celtics postseason, however long that might be. Boston is reduced to relying on Mikki Moore for long stretches of play. Ouch. Expect KG to make a miraculous comeback if Boston makes it back home for game 6. He won't stomach sitting out for long and he's already said he's delaying surgery until the offseason.

Minus Powe and KG, Boston's chances of upending Cleveland have slipped to none. The Cavs should sweep Detroit, who, surprise surprise, can't turn it on in the playoffs and are not at all dangerous like some writers suggested. Sub-500 teams don't turn it on and off. Detroit's in fo a long offseason. Sheed has nothing left, AI was a mistake, and Tayshaun's peaked as a third or fourth banana at best. What happened to his defense? Curry can't reach these guys. Maybe firing Flip was a little premature. All he ever did was lead the team to the eastern conference finals twice.

In the west, utah is just outmanned by the lakers. They may take game 3 because of the boost from the home crowd, but even those fans shouldn't expect much out of this team at this point. They need shooters badly.

Welcome to the playoffs, Portland. After getting absolutely crushed by the Rockets at home, Roy and Co. responded nicely in game 2. Yes, Roy is that good. 42 and wow.

Don't look now, but the two hottest teams in baseball are the Marlins and the Dodgers. Makes me wish Joe Angel was still calling Marlins games so we could hear a lot of his signature call, "the Marlins are in the WIN column."

thumbs are getting tired. More thoughts when I'm back home.

and then he was like BOOM!

Two quick thoughts before I crash for the night:

1. Sunday Night Football won't be as fun this season without Madden calling the games. Oh sure, Collinsworth is a great analyst, but Madden had his own unique way of showing people the game. He gets a lot of shit, and rightfully so sometimes, for lines like "the team that scores more touchdowns will win the game." I mean really, no shit, Sherlock. But he also knew the ins and outs of line play and it's a rare analyst that can describe what's going on in the trenches. And his Maddenisms made boring games a little more fun. Collinsworth already supplanted Madden in the broadcast booth of his own video game in the Xbox and PS3 versions, and that's a damn travesty.

2. KG is out for the first round and likely the entire playoffs. And so there are now only two legitimate contenders in the NBA: Cleveland and LA. The Celts will handle Chicago and maybe Orlando, but definitely not Cleveland. Not without KG.

Playoff time for the NBA

Listening to Frank Deford on NPR as I type this. He's like the Andy Rooney of sports, all full of amazement at trends that people have seen and lived through for the last 15 years. Who knew that a point guard was just as important as a big man in basketball? Or that point guards can create their own shot? Or that, and I hope you're sitting down for this revelation, Magic revolutionized the position. He seems to have no idea that basketball stats have gotten increasingly complex and comprehensive and that yes, we can determine if say Chris Paul has a greater impact on his team than Tyson Chandler. Note to Deford: Paul makes Chandler a good player, so yes, the point guard is more valuable in this case. Seems like he slept through the 90s when, aside from the Duncan-Robinson Spurs in '99 and the Dream-led Rockets in '94 and '95, the decade was dominated by a shooting guard named Michael Jordan. Hell, you could argue that since the late 80s, guards determined who won the NBA championship. Magic and Isiah were the two most important players from '87-'90. I'll give him this: the 2000s have been dominated by big men (Shaq and Duncan have combined for 6 of the titles in the decade and Garnett was arguably the most important Celtic last year), but all that means is that Deford doesn't know basketball pre-2000.

On to more important things.

Well, the 82 game NBA season is finally coming to a close and here's what we think we know about it:

1. The Lakers will be unchallenged in the West and maybe sweep through everyone. They'll only lose a game if they're bored. With Bynum back, the team is at full strength, and this was a group that trampled through the West without much effort even without their 7 foot prodigy.

2. The Cavs and Celtics will meet up in the Eastern Conference Finals. They have to. The season has been building to this matchup.

3. The Cavs will win the East if Garnett isn't 100%.

4. Garnett is not 100%.

5. Orlando needs to dominate a postseason series before people start accepting them as a bonafide championship contender.

6. Seeds 4-8 don't matter in the East. Only Miami has a chance at putting a real scare into one of the top teams. Chicago looks good, but do you really trust Vinny Del Negro to win a playoff series?

7. Seeds 2-8 don't matter in the West. And there could be 6 teams in that bunch with 50 wins. But each one of those teams is so fundamentally flawed (Portland has no playoff experience, the Spurs are old and broken down, the Hornets look out of sorts and Chandler and Peja are hurt, Houston doesn't have a go-to end of game scorer, Utah just looks awful lately, the Mavs are the Mavs and still have to rely on Jason Kidd to defend at least one athletic point guard in the playoffs (Yikes!) and Denver has no front court depth) that it seems unlikely that any of them will get past the Lakers.

8. Out of those flawed teams, I like Portland and the Rockets. Yao and Artest should be enough to get the Rockets out of the first round if they play either the Hornets or the Mavs. Portland can beat just about any of the other teams that aren't the Lakers except maybe the Spurs. Parker's a tough matchup for them and the playoff experience of the Spurs could prove too much for the young Trailblazers.

9. Why is everyone saying that Detroit is dangerous? This has been a common theme in the latter part of the season by sportswriters on every major site. Detroit is terrible and the thought that a sub-500 team can turn it on in the playoffs is absurd. I've watched a little bit of Detroit basketball this year and Rasheed Wallace is done. He's not just hurt, he's spent. He's got nothing in the tank. If he catches fire from 3 point range, he can be dangerous, but he's not willing or able to consistently post up players and defend the post. They count on Kwame Brown for big minutes. I think that should be repeated. They count on KWAME BROWN, YES, THAT KWAME BROWN, the one with BUST branded all over him, for big minutes. Tayshaun isn't that good offensively. He should be. He has all the tools, but for some reason, he just hasn't been that great. This team doesn't have a point guard. They have a bunch of shooting guards with Will Bynum, Rip Hamilton, A.I. (though he's played his last game with the team), Arron Afflalo and Rodney Stuckey. With Chauncey, this team is a 4 seed and is dangerous. They still wouldn't be beating the top teams, but they'd beat anyone from the 5th seed down and they'd take any of the Big 3 in the East to at least 6 games. But they made a bonehead deal for A.I. and now they're the 8th seed and they look like the easiest team to beat in either conference.

10. The Cavs are the best team in the league, but I'm not sure that anyone is afraid of playing them. In the West, there's a scramble to avoid playing the Lakers in the first or second round. I don't see that in the East. I think Boston and Orlando both want Cleveland and Orlando, especially, has manhandled Cleveland in the regular season and so has no reason to fear them. Even Detroit, who aren't a threat to anyone and will probably be swept and blown out by 20 in each game against the Cavs, don't fear them. I suspect that might change once the Cavs sweep Detroit.

Chicago's the big winner of the Cutler trade

I know. They traded two first round picks and Kyle Orton, but it's worth it. The Bears knew what they had in Kyle Orton. He can be a decent quarterback with the right talent around him. He can manage a game effectively. He can make two or three big throws a game and hand off to a running back for the rest of it. Essentially, he's what Kerry Collins is now. But Cutler can be spectacular. Cutler is a franchise QB. He threw for more than 4,000 yards last year. He's very good. The Bears are now set at the quarterback position for the next 10 years. I think any team would gladly give up a decent talent and two 1st round picks to be set at the most important position in the game for the next decade.

As for the Broncos, well, you never ever trade a franchise quarterback, especially one that's only 25 years old. They'll regret this for years. Kyle Orton might be good enough for them, but they'll always wonder what if. I think there's enough around Orton in Denver to make him effective. Their offensive line is solid. They've got good receivers in Eddie Royal and Brandon Marshall. They have a stable of decent running backs. They should be able to be effective offensively. But, think of how good they would be with a great quarterback. As it is, the Broncos don't look like they're challenging the Chargers for the division any time soon.

Side note on the Chargers: They went 8-8, snuck into the playoffs in the last week of the regular season, and have done absolutely nothing to improve the team in the offseason. How can they be satisfied with an 8-8 team? Oh right, Norv's the coach. They better watch out. The cellar dwellers of the AFC West have both gotten better. Oakland will continue to get better as JaMarcus Russell improves. They've got a dynamic backfield with Michael Bush, Darren McFadden and Justin Fargas. Their receivers improved late in the year and they're in position to draft a special talent like Michael Crabtree. Kansas City traded for a real quarterback. No offense to Tyler Thigpen, who looked good in some games last year, but Matt Castle was great last year and should be good for KC. They kept Tony Gonzalez. Dwayne Bowe should be even better with a real QB throwing to him. And the defense has to get better with all the youth they have there. In fact, had they not stupidly traded Jared Allen last year (double-digit sack machine and he was only 26 at the time), this team would look like a sleeper contender.

Instant Karma?

The Orlando Magic lost to the surging, but lowly Toronto Raptors tonight, 99-95. The home loss hurts Orlando because they're competing with the Celtics for the number two seed in the Eastern Conference, and they have now fallen percentage points behind Boston. But should they have seen this loss coming?

From the AP by way of ESPN.com: In an April Fool's joke that left everyone but the contestant laughing, the Magic made a fan think he was shooting a half-court shot for $100,000 at halftime. The fan was blindfolded, and the crowd was told beforehand to cheer as if he made the shot. The young contestant, named Dan, missed badly but believed he won and danced around the court in a frenzy. Before being told it was a joke and showed the replay he said, "I just got laid off at work." He was given a 100 Grand Bar of candy instead but was not laughing.

Poor taste, Orlando Magic.

A tale of two inbounds plays

I haven't written much about the tournament because I don't like to harp on how I'm losing money, but I caught the end of the Villanova-Pitt game and I had to point out a couple things.

Villanova might be the best team in the tournament when they are on. I saw them dismantle Duke and that game was even more one-sided than the final score indicated. Against Pitt, Nova was not at its best, but they still had spurts that made me think that not even Pitt's tough squad could hang with them.

The other thing worth noting: Villanova ran the all-time worst inbounds play ever with about 6 seconds left in the game. Facing full court pressure, no Nova players were coming to the ball until it was too late. The inbounder threw a full court pass that couldn't be handled, Pitt stole the ball, was fouled (doh!) and tied the game. Nova then made up for it by running an incredible inbounds play following the Pitt free throws, and having guard Scottie Reynolds drive half the court for the game-winning floater.

The obligatory Raiders update that only two people care about

By request of Jesse Bryan, here's an update on what's happening in the crazier part of the great north bay.

The Raiders have essentially swapped Jake Grove for Samson Satele. ESPN the Magazine, which by the way is a lot of glossy pages without a lot of content, is high on Jake Grove, but I don't see it. He's not a bad center, but he's injury prone and the big knock on him was that he wasn't very strong. He had a good year last year, but he always struggled against bigger nose tackles (Jamal Williams ate him alive last season) and there's a possibility that his numbers were inflated by facing extremely weak D-lines in Denver and KC twice a year. Samson Satele is 24 and has two years of experience already. He's a good fit for the zone blocking system the Raiders employ and he's cheaper than Grove. Player salaries are going to continue to be a bigger part of teams' planning now that the salary cap will most likely be out after this year.

Look at this deal another way. The Raiders let Grove go, saved money and then traded a sixth round pick for his replacement, a starter on a division champ last year. That's a great deal.

Belated condolences to the family of Marquis Cooper, Corey Smith and Will Bleakley.

Cornell Green was arrested for hitting the mother of his children with a mop handle. Idiot.

Circle your calendars. The Raiders are playing on Thanksgiving for the first time in 39 years. They also get a Monday Night Football home opener against the Chargers. That could be ugly.

Contrary to popular belief, the Raiders never inquired about Terrell Owens and the Buffalo Bills, a team nobody picked to sign him, signed him. And this is something I really hate about the sports media. Whenever someone who's a talented malcontent is out on the market, the assumption is always that the Raiders will sign him. Why is that? They've passed on a number of gifted assholes in the past. But people like Chris Mortensen will continue to further these rumors without any basis for it. Mort is especially bad about this because he's admitted in the past that he doesn't bother contacting the Raiders for their side of the story.

The Raiders have actually been pretty quiet in free agency this year. They took care of their own (Nnamdi Asomugha and Chris Johnson's deals) and got some bargains to shore up areas of needs (Khalif Barnes, Samson Satele). They cut Gibril Wilson a bit prematurely, but he wasn't worth the money. Plus, now they need a safety so Al can draft his favorite position in the draft. Ugh.

Speaking of the draft, here's what Al and Tom should be looking at: Receiver, Defensive Line, Offensive Line, Linebacker, and then maybe Safety. There's a few really good receivers in the first round. Crabtree is going to be great. He's got great hands, great vision and incredible athleticism. Percy Harvin, if he stays healthy, is by far the most explosive receiver of the last few years. Forget the 40 times. The guy is what they call "football fast," meaning he's quick on the field. Even Jeremy Maclin, who I'm not as high on, has the potential to be very good. He's like a Harvin-lite, quick, elusive and deceptively strong.

Another guest post about the Marlins from you know who

On vacation in beautiful sunny, hot, humid, sometimes disgusting...er..often disgusting Florida and I thought it was appropriate to throw it to our favorite guest poster, Jesse Bryan, for a look at how the Marlins are doing. They're trying to build a stadium in the least convenient part of Miami to travel to, right in the middle of a stinking shithole of a neighborhood (no offense to the people that live there, but you know) rather than building in West Broward so that the Broward and West Palm residents that make up the bulk of their season ticket holders could easily reach the stadium. Like most Miami stadium/arena ventures, I expect that it will be evident that this one is a complete failure within two years. Also, the Marlins will still draw 7,000 fans a night because the stadium has never been the big problem. A new stadium is not a cure for sports apathy. Anyway, on with the guest post. Thanks again to Jesse for doing this, he's a fine writer who loves his Marlins:



Ladies and jellyfish,



Due to the scintillating success of my first post and the non-stop demand for more marlins chatter, I will try to make my posts this relatively constant throughout the season. First, I want to once again thank Jason “Boney-Bologna” Sanchez for letting me use his forum for my expert in-depth coverage. I also want to extend a warm hug and caramel apple to you, the reader, for your continued and undying support. Even though you did not give me the curtsey of leaving a single comment on my first post, I know that in your heart you made enough comments to fill the Nile River 3 times over. And for that I thank you and dedicate this post to you, my loyal and devoted reader. Anyway, I wanted to devote this post to one of the most important events in Marlins history: the new stadium.

Say hello to your Miami Marlins (b. 2012) and adios to any talk of the Las Vegas Marlins. The stadium has been approved and will be built in Little Havana on the site of the old orange bowl. Besides the creation of the team in 1991, this has to be the most significant event in team history. It has been over a decade in the making and it is pretty impressive/shocking they were able to get this done considering the economic climate in Miami, which has been one of the hardest hit spots in the country. My gracious host, Mr. Sanchez, has expressed serious concerns about the public financing of the stadium (which I also expressed), I now must say I cautiously sort-of but not really, okay I do, but for my own selfish fish-loving reasons, support it.

$480 million of the $634 million cost will from public money (ie: from Winifred William Taxpayer). The plan here is to have tourist dollars in the form of a hotel bed tax pay for the bulk of this. Fair enough. There were also clauses included to make sure Loria doesn’t pull a fast one by selling the team once the stadium is built. If he sells (which he has repeatedly said he has no intention to do so) in the first year the city gets 90% of the profits and every year thereafter it goes down a certain percentage. Not bad, not bad. The yay-sayers say it will create vital jobs in this depressed economy. The nay-sayers say it will be short-term fix and is not a long term solution. Both have valid points. Is the city fronting too much of the bill? Probably (although this actually lower than some other stadium deals). Is this the best place for a city devastated by the current economic climate to put its money? Probably not. Do stadiums help the communities they are forced upon? Historically, this answer seems to be an emphatic “no”. So I don’t know what to think. At least Miami didn’t buy 15 or so Apache helicopters with $480 mil. Socio-economic factors aside, for the team and fans it is great news. This could finally mean retention of players and actual free-agent signings (but the no-name players and underdog spirit are a big reason what attracts me to the team, no?). Will this new stadium attract a significantly greater fan base that actually attends games? I tend to think yes. I believe the marlins potential lies within it being a Miami team. That’s where the real fan potential lies and where this team can really build up a legacy. Who needs/wants the Boca Raton/Palm Beach County yuppie scum anywho (I don’t get why people think they are so important.. Whenever I’m in WPB during a marlins game, we generally have to ask to have the game turned on, and even then no gives a rats popsickle). There is also the issue of what happens if (when) it goes over-budget. Either it’s happening. It is finally happening. Pro-Player is a horrible spot for the fish to play 81 games a year and the new stadium design is pretty impressive (retractable roof, etc) and will surely up the attendance numbers. One side of me is thrilled to have the team guaranteed a future. The other side wonders if this is the best use of money and would it not be better to invest the money into social/economic services for the same area. Are giant public works projects that ultimately put the bulk of money into the riches hands really the best way to fix an ailing economy? This whole thing is full of contradictions. So reader, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the issue so feel free to leave a comment or 2.

On the spring training front, it has been moving along about as fast as a dead slug, but opening day is coming faster than Mike Lindstrom’s fastball. I will have a post before opening day about this season’s expectations (it was supposed to be this post, but I got carried away with the stadium banter). I think the marlins have a great team this year and have the potential to take the division or wild card. Nolasaco’s pitched a rare spring training no-hitter a few nights ago so bravo to him. I fully expect him to carry that into the regular season. Until next time my little fishies!

To get you salivating for more, here is a preview of words/phrases that may or not be used in my next post: team, baseball, catfish, underwear, chicken socks, Deleware, rosemary, the Great Unknown, Henry Kissinger, Ocean’s 12, that-a-boy, moonbat, zygote, hand-me-down, The fall of Babylon, furry, Chiclets, cold-cuts, underground railroad, Shinobi, hamster, ricotta cheese, quantum physics, and hair.

catching up

Something called the World Baseball Classic happened and Japan won. It looked like baseball but felt like soccer to most Americans, including the USA team that played in the thing. None of them cared about the outcomes of the games and used them to try and "get their reps in" for spring training. In other news, Davey Johnson got to pretend to be a real, bonafide big league manager again and showed exactly why he shouldn't have that job longer than three weeks.

The Broncos continue to piss off moody quarterback Jay Cutler. This seems to be a really bad strategy for handling your star player. The guy had a Pro Bowl season last year, and while some writers have been quick to point to his overall losing record as a starter, I'm even quicker to point out that the Broncos have been deceptively shitty, especially on defense, during that period. Point is, it's not Cutler's fault the team is lousy. He's growing into the job. Only been at it for a few years and he's getting better each year.

What is his fault is the thin skin he wears. He's pissed about almost being traded so he wants to be traded. Go figure.

The NBA season is winding up and the teams are locking in their seeding. The Lakers are clearly number one in the West and San Antonio is most likely locked into the two spot. In the East, Cleveland has a stranglehold on the one spot and Boston and Orlando will most likely follow in that order. Atlanta (!) is four and the Heat will rise no further than fifth. That leaves Philly to hold off Detroit for six and one other team to sneak into the playoffs. The three through eight seeds in the West are still in flux and no one's quite sure if surging Phoenix can sneak in and knock the Mavs out for the privilege of being swept by LA in the first round.

Your NBA Finals: Lakers vs. Cavs/Celts, but most likely Cavs. LA in 6. The Lakers match up well with the Cavs. I'll write more about this as we get closer to it actually happening, but let's just say this: the Lakers can't handle quick driving guards (read: Rondo). Spot up shooters (Mo Williams, Boobie Gibson), on the other hand, are a lot easier to defend.

see you in another three weeks....heh.

The real reason the Tyson Chandler trade fell through

So New Orleans gave up on their season and traded Tyson Chandler to Okie Dokie City for expiring contracts. Except that Okie Dokie City did a medical test and said Chandler had a previously unknown foot injury that was so devastating that they wouldn't accept the trade, even though Chandler is expected to play this season. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, who watches the NBA thought the trade rejection was a little off. I'm here to say it was downright fishy. This reeks of the heavy hand of the Commish. Here's my conspiracy theory: The Commish would not allow New Orleans to throw away their season. He wants Chris Paul and company to be in the playoffs so he can showcase Paul, one of the NBA's biggest new stars. Furthermore, the more contenders there are in the West (though really it's the Lakers, the Spurs and then everyone else in that order), the better the ratings will be come playoff time. If this is the case, I agree wholeheartedly with the Commish and fully support this. Shame on New Orleans for giving up on their season when they're in line for a playoff spot. I've never seen this happen. Teams try to get better heading into the playoffs. Sometimes they gamble and it doesn't work (see Dallas Mavericks Jason Kidd trade for an example), but they almost never actively try to get worse to save a few bucks down the road.

Expect the lottery balls to fall Okie Dokie City's way in a few months as a reward for going along with the Commish. If Okie Dokie City wins the Blake Griffin sweepstakes, then you'll know I was right about my conspiracy theory.

Jesse's Guest Post

So as sports slows down, so to does the Idiot Fan. But fear not, because I have opened the floor to a very special guest blogger. I probably won't ever post on the Florida Marlins except to say the state and the city should not give that team money to build a new stadium when the state and city are so far in debt that they have to cut basic social services. But no state should give any team money in this climate. Anywho, enough economic babble, on with the show..........

------------------------------------------------------------
Marlins Report



Aloha Fish fans. I'd first like to thank the Idiot Fan and his devoted readership for allowing myself to post about the most untalked about team in baseball, the Florida Marlins. So as we gear up for another season of exciting marlins diamond diggery doo, let me start by first examining the off season moves by the Teal Tossers [of baseballs]:



The Great:

Kevin Gregg for Jose Ceda. A brilliant trade by the fish to attain the powerful arm in Jose Ceda, the much heralded prospect from the Cubs (#2 or 3 prospect in the entire cubs system I believe), for the waste of space that is Kevin Gregg, who's 9 lives (with lives being a euphemism for the his league leading 9 blown saves in 2008) have been exhausted. What was worse Mr. Gregg? Was it giving up that save in that ridiculous 17-18 loss to Colorado or was it giving up that grand slam in the top of the ninth (fish had a 3 – 2 lead and were still in the hunt) to the Mets on my BIRTHDAY. Good riddance sir. I hope you catch bed bugs.


Keeping Jorge Cantu, Ricky Nolasco, and Josh Johnson for at least another year: While I wish they would sign some gosh dang multi-year contracts, at least they're keeping these guys around for another year. Ricky and Josh should have monster years. Both are ace quality pitchers and it will be nice to seem them


Extending Fredi's contract: 2 years Okay. So I haven't been the most supportive of good ole Fredi in the past. I guess I just like my managers to smoke cigars and show some emotion every now and then a la Jack McKeon. However, I do really think Fredi is the perfect manager for this super young team. Hopefully, he learned his lesson last year about overworking your bullpen too early (think Pinto) and thank god he doesn't even have to consider putting Kevin Gregg in there. It's nice to see the fish taking an interest in keeping a team for once.



The Good:

Scott Proctor: The Fish desperately needed another dependable arm in the bullpen and that's exactly what they got with this solid free agency pick up. Proctor had impressive numbers including 3.5 ERA and 1.2 WHIP in 2006 with the Yanks. He was injured last year, so those numbers do not reflect how he pitches healthy. This is a classic fish move picking up a solid reliever coming off a tough year on the cheap. The fish bullpen was certainly an issue going into 2009, making Proctor is a welcome addition. The fact is, Fredi killed Pinto last year, who after a very strong start, became a liability in the bullpen as he racked up the most appearances for a reliever before he went on IR. Proctor is an important addition to a bullpen that should be much stronger this year.



Mike Jacobs for Leo Nuñez: Another solid trade in my opinion. Jacobs was worthless and worthlesser on defense. His home runs came at the most timeliness of times, like when the fish were up or down by 7. His strikeouts always came when it mattered and they came frequently. Statistically he was the worst first baseman in baseball last year consistently making poor, lazy plays. Nunez, while untested, is another strong arm with great potential and is another fine addition to the fish bullpen which is really looking quite formidable, despite its youth. Last year in KC he posted an fine 2.98 ERA and I expect similar or better numbers from him this year.





The bad:

Scott Olsen and Josh Willingham for Emilio Bonofacio and 2 minor leaguers. What? Come again? Hello? While I have no attachment to either player and definitely glad to see Scott "Here have some jello shots Don Hopscotch and Mott McSwilly" Olsen go, is this really all they could get for them: an above-average defender/terrible bat and a few decent-at-best prospects?!?!? I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!! Top top it off, the Fish front office doesn't expect Bonofacio to make the cut in spring training. Billowing Bananas!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll retract my previous statement, as I did like Willingham (AKA Woogybottom). The fish had to cut either Woogybottom or Hermida, and since the fish FO Hermida has a love affair with Hermida, they said adios to Woogy. His numbers before he got injured last year were absolutely staggering and it would be disappointing if he were to regain that form, while Hermida doesn't find his.



Not signing Joe Nelson. COME ON FISH!!! Joe had a great year last year, and while yes he is in the twilight of his career, it would only of taken a few more hundred thousand to have him for another season. In 54 innings he posted a 2 ERA with a 1.18 WHIP and 60 K's. Sad to see you go Joe, but I'm glad you found a spot on the Rays who paid you a lot more.





The Fish front office being the Fish front office

Back-up catcher. While I am happy with Baker (although realistic that he can't repeat last year's performance), it would have been nice to sign one of the zillion catchers out there. Or even better, it would have been nice to actually of gotten value for Olsen and Woogybottom. There is still talk of signing Pudge, and while that is a long shot, every day that goes by ups the chances ever so little. I'm also a bit dismayed to see Treanor go, and I wonder if the fish regret not retaining him now that they have been unable to land another catcher.



Not signing Uggla to a multi-year contract: I know the Fish hate signing multi-year contracts, and I also know Uggla was downright horrendous after the all-star break, but still, give the man some love!!! I'm happy he won his arbitration case as he certainly deserves it.


Dan Meyer from free agency: With the unfortunate loss of Rhode, who was downright dominating in limited timelast year, the fish needed a situational lefty. They got it with Meyer. He has only pitched 47 innings of major league ball and while his era has been astronomical, his whip is only 1.76. The fish seem to have a knack for finding these bullpen types so hopefully he'll turn into another one of those fish finds.

Wes Helms 2 year contract: Hmmmm....So, you don't sign multi-year contracts, but you sign, off all people, Wes Helms to a 2 year contract. Wes is a solid utility player and I'm happy to see him stay, but sheesh! Oh fish.

Overall: Not bad fish. Not bad. No huge surprises one way or the other. They retained a majority of last year's team while taking out the trash (Jacobs, Olsen, Gregg). The Willingham/Olsen trade is downright mindboggling, but I think the Jacobs and Gregg trades almost make up for it. They've certainly shored up the bullpen which was a big concern need. A backup catcher (Rabelo isn't going to cut it) is still an issue as the fish should of been more aggressive in landing someone in that position. But I really can't complain. The front office did what they said they would do.


Okay Fish Fans. That's my off-season moves report. In the coming days I will update with my predictions for the season, my evaluation of the team, spring training news, and other various fish facts, like what was Billy the Marlins major in college.

The AFC is wide open, two too good to be true NBA trades, and why A-Rod fails in the clutch

Football first:

Look across the landscape that is the AFC and tell me who's a lock to make the playoffs. Pittsburgh a lock, but after that, nothing's guaranteed. Tennessee was the best team in the AFC this year, but they have huge question marks. For starters, can Kerry Collins replicate last season's magic run as a starter? And will they keep Albert Haynesworth, who was their most important player on defense?

Indy changed head coaches. The Dolphins might have been a one-year wonder. They have a tougher schedule this season. The Pats still have the giant question about the state of Brady's knee. The Ravens have a few key free agents on the defense, and the Chargers are coached by Norv Turner.

Houston looked decent at the end of the year, but this team's peak might be 9-7 or 8-8. The Broncos are going to be rebuilding. That defense needs a lot of help and I think they're about a year away from being a serious playoff threat. The Chiefs are about 3 years away at least, and the Raiders are the Raiders. I like Cable as their head coach, but I can't pencil them, even lightly, in the playoffs because of the past 5 years. They have to show me they can win more than 5 games in a season before I start to believe in them.

The Jets have questions at quarterback and the defense faded down the stretch. They should be better under Rex Ryan, but he's a first year head coach, so you never know. The Bills are coached by Dick Jauron, so you can never take them too seriously.

The Browns are the Browns and the Bengals have a lot of holes on offense and defense. Jacksonville completely imploded this year and David Garrard was exposed as a one-year wonder.

And yet, it's the offseason, and every team is dreaming of the Super Bowl. And really, if the Cardinals can make the Super Bowl and if the Dolphins can win 11 games a season after losing 15, why can't a team like the Raiders or the Jags make a run in the playoffs?

NBA Stuff (stop reading if you don't care about basketball or baseball from this point on)

Two possible trades involving two Suns that would make for the best stories in the NBA this year. One of them is a really smart trade and the other is questionable.

Trade #1: Amare Stoudemire for Shawn Marion and Michael Beasley or spare parts from the Heat. The Heat need to do this deal. They would have essentially turned Shaq and a #1 pick into Amare Stoudemire. How is that not a great deal? Stoudemire paired with D-Wade makes the Heat a 50 win team and the 4th best team in the East. That team becomes good enough to beat Orlando and scare the Cavs and the Celtics in the playoffs.

For the Suns, it would be the ultimate admission of a mistake. They traded Marion for Shaq because Marion and Stoudemire couldn't co-exist and they wanted to shake up the team. Well that shake-up is an abysmal failure. The Suns never recovered from losing to the Spurs in the first round of last year's playoffs. They inexplicably forced Mike D'Antoni out of town and then hired Terry Porter (really?!?) to get the team to play better defense, except that really hasn't worked and now everyone on that team hates playing in Phoenix.

Trade #2: Shaq for Lamar Odom and spare parts. This would be huge. Might not be a great deal for the Lakers, since Odom's versatility is more of a benefit to them when Bynum's healthy and playing, but for sheer storylines, Shaq back with Kobe on the Lakers would be huge. He would immediately fill their need for interior toughness while Bynum's out. And he wouldn't have to play big minutes since they have Gasol. And when Bynum came back, he could play 20 minutes a game and save himself for the playoffs. I'd like this trade a little more if the Lakers hadn't traded Radmanovich (who sucks, but can score occasionally) for Adam Morrison (who REALLY sucks and can't score even occasionally). Odom can fill a lot of roles for a team. He's a good complimentary scorer, good rebounder, decent defender and a good ballhandler. He's come up in a lot of trade scenarios, but I think the Lakers would be smart to keep him. If this did happen, it'd be funny that Lakers would be trading Odom for Shaq since they got Odom from the Heat in a trade with Shaq. Both these trades would be like teams hitting the reset button.

MLB (stop reading if you cared about the NBA, but not about MLB)
Why A-Rod always fades in the clutch

As it turns out, the dude just doesn't know how to cycle his roids properly. He gets to September and he lays off the juice and turns into a normal player. Then, knowing he doesn't have his usual pick-me-up, he panics and makes abnormally stupid plays in the field and at bat. Hence, his propensity to fold in the playoffs.

The Arizona Cardinals might win the Super Bowl

Think about that for a second. The Cardinals, who like the Clippers in basketball and well, previously the Rays in baseball, were so dependably bad for years might win the Super Bowl. They've got the better quarterback, better receivers, the better offensive line, better special teams and the better wildcard in this game.

Their coach Ken Whisenhunt knows the Steelers like no other coach in the league aside from Steeler's coach Mike Tomlin. Whisenhunt ran the Steelers offense for years and has seen all of defensive coordinator Dick LeBeau's blitz packages.

That's a huge advantage.

The only situation that was remotely similar was Jon Gruden coaching the Bucs against the Raiders in the Super Bowl. Gruden knew the Raiders offense and had his team so prepared to face it, that they knew how the plays would develop before they actually did.

I could see the same thing happening here. Whisenhunt might have his offense so well prepared that they'll be able to know who's blitzing and who's dropping into coverage before they even get set at the line of scrimmage. And if the line can protect Kurt Warner, he should be able to take apart the Cover 3 and Zone Blitz looks that the Steelers favor.

One more thing: I've heard a lot about how this will basically be a home game for the Steelers because their fans travel so well. I think the large number of non-fans who go to the Super Bowl neutralize the impact of the real fans there. Again, I point to the Raiders-Bucs Super Bowl, as much as I hate to remember that game. That game was in San Diego, where there's a huge contingent of Raiders fans who show up to every Raiders-Chargers game. They had no impact on the Super Bowl whatsoever.

The Arizona Cardinals are going to the Super Bowl

Clearly, I know nothing about football. I give up trying to predict what's going to happen. The 9-7 Cardinals were supposed to be the worst team in the playoffs. They scored 427 points and gave up 426 in the season. That's terrible. They played in the worst conference in football. They gave up 56 points to the Jets, 48 to the Eagles on Thanksgiving and 47 to the Patriots in December. They're not supposed to be good, let alone in the Super Bowl.

There's only one logical conclusion: everyone is lousy this year, or at least severely flawed. The Eagles were a super shaky team that alternated between overachieving and underachieving. I, along with the rest of the world, wrote them off after the Ravens loss, and they managed to sneak into the playoffs with a 9-6-1 record. This was clearly the worst NFC championship game ever.

The best team in the conference, the Giants, had a quarterback that couldn't handle the winds of the Meadowlands despite having played there all year. Go figure.

Back to the Eagles, their biggest flaw was red zone and short yardage offense. They had problems converting short yardage situations all year. Ditto for Arizona, who also couldn't play defense.

Dallas was a paper tiger with a bunch of me-first primadonnas that sank the team with whining and poor effort. They also have the most unclutch quarterback ever in Tony Romo (a great place for ribs).

Carolina had Jake Delhomme at quarterback. Nuff said.

The Falcons were just OK on defense and had a rookie quarterback who didn't vary his snap count at all in a playoff game and cost his team the game. Seriously. Arizona jumped the snap on almost every play because they knew the count. That's a huge rookie mistake.

Green Bay couldn't play fourth quarter defense. The Bears' defense was mediocre, the offense inconsistent, and the special teams just ordinary. Minnesota has Brad Childress as its coach and the Tavaris Jackson/Gus Ferotte combo at quarterback.

I could go on and on, but that's pretty much it. Every team, at least in the NFC, had one killer flaw.

Happy Birthday, Jake Delhomme!

For your 34th birthday, Jake, you're getting a backup quarterback job on a new team. Not much of a present, but the demotion is certainly justified. A whopping six turnovers for a team that was favored to win its game by more than 10 points.

Jake added a meaningless touchdown pass to Steve Smith with 50 seconds left with the game out of reach.

Final stats:
C/ATT YDS AVG TD INT
J. Delhomme 17/34 205 6.0 1 5
FUM LOST REC
J. Delhomme 1 1 0

So the numbers improved slightly with that last meaningless drive, but that still should be enough to force Carolina to get a new QB in the offseason. I knew Delhomme had a bad performance in him, but I couldn't fathom that he'd crap the bed this much. His previous worst performance this year:

WEEK OPP RESULT CMP ATT YDS CMP% LNG TD INT RAT
10 @OAK W 17-6 7 27 72 25.9 27 1 4 12.3

Ouch. Not franchise QB numbers at all.

Cards-Panthers

Jake Delhomme is putting on a bad performance for the ages. There's 2 minutes left in the game and these are his stats:
CP/AT YDS TD INT
J. Delhomme 14/30 171 0 5
Fumbles FUM LOST REC YDS
J. Delhomme 1 1 0 0

6 turnovers in one game. He's played his way off the team next season, that's for sure. I expect these numbers to get worse in the last two minutes. Cards are up 33-7 and Steve Smith has one catch for 35 yards. More on this game later.

dah da-da dah dah

GO GATORS!!!!!!!!!!!

Miami has the Dolphins, the greatest football team?

Had a big viewing party for the Dolphins-Ravens game and it ended on a down note. The Fins lost big, but I should have seen that coming. The Dolphins' offense did not match up well against the Ravens' D. Pennington had his worst game of the season and the team just couldn't get anything going until the game was out of reach. On defense, the Dolphins were solid, but they couldn't get any pressure on Joe Flacco, and the Ravens physical running game wore that defense down by the end of the game.

The Eagles won the Bad Coaches Bowl in the second game of the day. I didn't watch much of the game, but I think I can safely say that both coaches were actively trying to avoid 3rd and short because neither team has been able to convert that all season. Of course, in the Eagles' case, when you NEVER run the ball on 3rd and 1 and you always settle for these rinky dink passes in the flat, you won't have much success with short yardage conversions. While the Ravens look like a Super Bowl team, I think the Eagles still have to notch an impressive win against a team that is not fundamentally flawed (i.e. not Dallas or Minnesota).

why i don't usually comment on hockey

I'm watching SportsCenter and they're showing NHL highlights where hockey star Sidney Crosby cheapshots a guy and gets into a fight. This is why I don't watch hockey. The NHL uses fights as a cheap sideshow to get people interested in the league. It's both pathetic and unprofessional. And unlike other sports where fights usually result in suspensions for the players involved, the NHL puts these guys in a penalty box for a few minutes and then lets them continue playing the game. This is why you see teams with players that have little ability save that of fighting to play the role of enforcer. If they dumped the fights, got rid of teams that don't play in cold weather states (looking right at you, Florida Panthers and LA Kings) and played more games outdoors (that visual is one of the best in sports), I'd actually start watching.

Ugh...the Colts

The Falcons lost, and whatever, they weren't great on the road this year and a rookie QB starting his first playoff game on the road isn't likely to win it. The Cardinals played a better game and came out with a better gameplan, neutralizing Michael Turner and putting the game in Matt Ryan's hands.

Ok, that's out of the way. Now to the more interesting game. The Colts and the Chargers. Save for one magical post-season when their running game and defense were clicking and Peyton led a remarkable comeback against the Pats, they have had post-season letdowns every year. Losing to the Pats is one thing. Those Patriot teams had better defenses. But to lose to San Diego two years in a row, especially this year's team that was a fluky 8-8 division champ, that should have never been in the playoffs to start with, that was only in because Herm Edwards is the worst clock manager in football by far, this loss was just indefensible and inexplicable. The Colts defense, built for speed, couldn't contain Darren Sproles.

The key play of the game though had the Colts on offense. Up 17-14 and trying to grind out the clock, the Colts had a 3rd and 2 on the Indy 9 yard line. There's two options and only two in this situation: run for the 1st down or play action fake and throw for the first down. That's it. Instead, inexplicably, the Colts come out lined up with in the shotgun with an empty backfield. This is the first time I've seen them come out in that formation all year. So of course, Manning gets sacked and they're forced to punt. And that was the game.